| News on 09/23/2007 |  | This is the end of Chapter 9, and Volume 1. More importantly, at this point I feel it is appropriate to stop Seasons of Constancy.
This is stronger than a hiatus, because I am effectively relieving myself of the obligation to finish the series; however, I am not going so far as to call it the end of the series; there is more story to tell, and whether I do or not will be a decision made in the distant future.
In only a short while ago, I had realized that my comic has outlived many of the work that I envied. Initially, I took to that notion with pride; however, I gradually began to realize that equating length to virtue was a lie I was creating for myself, in hopes of scrounging up any kind of motivation I need to continue. The fact is, I don't have the motivation to continue SoC at the pace that I would like. Needing to search for different methods of motivation to simply keep a story continuing is but one signal that perhaps the right decision is, perhaps, not to continue.
The life of SoC has spanned almost seven years, which is pretty impressive, the many hiatuses and slow moments notwithstanding. Over that period, a lot has changed -- my style, my skill, my approach to writing, my priorities. A lot was accomplished as well. Thankfully, the core story has remained the same, and so has the honesty of the feelings and ideas I've wanted to convey. In its own strange irony, the comic rather successfully portrayed or even embodied the underlying theme of the piece, its namesake. I want to reassure my readers that the thought and passion I put into my story was honest up to and including this page; overall it was an ambitious and worthy personal experiment that I do not regret undertaking.
I am feeling that I will begin to regret my choice to continue pressing on with this piece.
SoC bares the burden of a multitude of mistakes, growing pains, and holistically, many unfocused areas as a result of its long time span. I understand that this is natural in a comic artist's progression, to make mistakes. The biggest mistake I made was to start the story open-ended, intending it to be one of those series that would happily continue indefinitely as long as I cared for it. The comic and plot have expanded so much that when I finally did put together a meaningful resolution for the story, it would put me only halfway through, with many, many more chapters to go. If I learned anything, it was that I shouldn't have attempted to do a story without a real plan to finish it. No matter how much SoC continues to improve, the weight of coming to terms with its past history remains, and that has been hurting my confidence, motivation, and spirit for quite some time. I tried to plan approaching future stories differently, to adapt the story to my current likings and interests; but even this simply couldn't conquer the weight of what SoC has culminated into. Without stopping SoC, I wouldn't be able to truly turn a new leaf until many years from now, hindering my personal artistic growth in turn. It has pulled me back many times from starting brand new projects and trying new ideas. This is the reason I'm stopping.
The contents of the next chapter were originally supposed to follow chapter 7; because of my desire to further flesh out the story, I added more chapters in between (8 and 9). To me, this next chapter would be one of the most important and deepest of SoC's chapters, and I have been really looking forward to it..literally, for years. However, knowing the burden of the comic and my inability to focus, I am worried that my own personal grievances will in fact make a big mess of it; I think it has, to some extent, done just that in many of the past chapters. Chapter 10 deserves more than that. So it may seem cowardly, but quitting now will prevent me from doing something I could really regret. It also leaves the door open to something very inviting, if I ever decide I'm ready and have the confidence to come back, conquer my grievances for good, and do Volume 2.
In the past few pages, I had the honor of working with my longtime friend Christine on the pages; she learned a lot doing it, and so have I. The great thing was that having her help me really motivated me to put out the pages, so for a while there we were updating regularly. However, when she took a break and I was left alone to continue the comic, I felt that I didn't have sufficient motivation to continue on my own. It's sad when I have to depend on others to give myself motivation, and if I continued to depend on Christine like that, it would be a disservice to her. That said, thanks for a great stint, AC, and stopping SoC doesn't preclude us from collaborating in the future.
As much as it will feel good to get the onus of finishing SoC off my chest, I'm not exactly happy of this choice: I possess much regret that I wasn't able to fulfill my promise to my readers. I kept telling you that I was going to finish the story, and I really thought I would...but in the end, it just didn't come to that. The pressure to move on with my life was too much. To the few of you who still keep up with the lives of the Llaeskarjtcez's and company, I whole heartedly apologize. Knowing that you're there makes my decision really hard. And for me, it is not easy to let go of characters you've been involved with for so many years. When I realize that I won't be continuing this story, that I won't be drawing these characters, I've actually become rather depressed about it. I believe this is the right decision to make, but it is by no means an easy one.
Sometimes I secretly wish that everybody would have stopped caring about this comic on their own; then, when the daily visitor count finally hit zero, then I would have no qualms of disappointing anyone. All in all though, I'm really glad that there are some people who do care about my work, have stuck it out, and kept me and my comic company through the years..It provides me with a positive glimmer that I might truly have the promise of being a great comic artist. SoC was never popular, and lately, the fact hasn't bothered me much. If I had the time to do it, and was happy and relaxed while doing it, and could still grow from it, I would be fine making it for just you folks.
It goes without saying that I still want to draw comics. I will soon have new projects on the horizon. It's been a while since I have felt that there was a clean slate in front of me. I know that I have lost some of your trust by falling back on my promise to finish SoC, but I do hope it was still worth it for you to follow SoC, and that you still would want to continue and follow me on my journey, which hasn't ended yet. I have always been of the philosophy that it's better to build the reputation of the artist than his stories. In addition, with a more cautious approach to development aspects, I may finally be able to make my promise to follow through and complete my stories.
Announcement of future projects will be posted on my studio website http://www.constancyroman.com. If you still want to follow my work, you can visit this site anytime.
Thank you for understanding. More importantly, thank you so much for everything you've done for me over the years. You've been good, kind readers who have always encouraged me to make the story that I wanted, and for that I'm grateful and fortunate. The lessons I learned from you and my appreciation for your support simply doesn't stop at SoC, and I'm keeping your spirit in my mind as I continue on. My future projects may look different, but in them is the same heart and drive that existed in SoC.
It would be a disservice to tell you what happens next in the story, from now until the ending. My ideas have evolved over the years, and if I do ever come back, my current ending may be completely obsolete. The characters of SoC -- Osi, Keka, Pikhe, En'Chin, Seji, Don, Ama, Shaank*o, Almes, Kleisse, Vaelcsbrene, and the rest -- and the world of Enocoiy, will simply continue on with their lives; for you as well as me, their future is uncertain; in real life, however, whose future isn't?
Besides, there are still things they, and you, can always count on.
Wish the best for them.
Thank you,
Bryan Wong
- Bryan Wong |
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